You can have moments in India that can shake your core and have the "power to alter the way you view the world and your place in it..."- Sarina Singh, India Lonely Planet coordinating author.
My goodness, looking back to my first days in Delhi and now (about 5 weeks later) I just shake my head and smile. I have looked at an empty blog entry page twice not knowing where to begin to summarize and after my latest experience taking a 10-day meditation course, I'm even at a greater loss for words...well, here is what the course consisted of:
10-day Vipassana Meditation Course- a technique taught in India more than 2500 years ago - there are meditation centers in Washington and California, by the way!
Here's a brief overview of the technique: http://www.dhamma.org/
I had to commit to staying for the entire 10 days of the course. The course is quite disciplined and I had commit to accepting this before registering.
I also had to keep a vow of Noble silence- meaning silence of the body, speech and mind. For 10 days I could not talk to anyone else, or even make eye contact with anyone else; I was basically looking down or away all the time, it was quite strange at the beginning. Even singing would be breaking this vow! It took all I had to even quiet my mind which, I think I finally accomplished for longer periods of time on day 7 or 8. I kept all valuables (passport, money, etc) including all books and writing materials (no reading, no writing for 10 days!!!) locked away somewhere else. I was so hungry for a pen the first few days that I would get criminal thoughts when I would eye a pen in the cafeteria; it was so funny and pathetic.*
Men and women are segregated and have different dormitories. We are only together to meditate in the main hall.
For 10 days I meditated for about 10 hours a day and followed this schedule:
4:00 am Morning wake-up bell
4:30-6:30 am Meditate in the hall or in your room
6:30-8:00 am Breakfast break
8:00-9:00 am Group meditation in the hall
9:00-11:00 am Meditate in the hall or in your room according to the teacher's instructions
11:00-12:00 noon Lunch break
12noon-1:00 pm Rest and interviews with the teacher
1:00-2:30 pm Meditate in the hall or in your room
2:30-3:30 pm Group meditation in the hall
3:30-5:00 pm Meditate in the hall or in your own room according to the teacher's instructions
5:00-6:00 pm Tea break
6:00-7:00 pm Group meditation in the hall
7:00-8:15 pm Teacher's Discourse in the hall
8:15-9:00 pm Group meditation in the hall
9:00-9:30 pm Question time in the hall
9:30 pm Retire to your own room--Lights out
Sitting for this long was very, very difficult (painful) at the beginning and as the teacher explains, it takes a lot of patience, persistence and diligence. This was at the physical level, the most challenging. Even the early wake up bell was not so bad; after the third day, my body was automatically waking up...
...and this is just the course at the practical level but then there is the technique itself which went beyond what I could have ever imagined. I feel like I was introduced to a whole new way of seeing life, of how to act of how to calm my mind and reflect on many past things in life. I've definitely been put to the test since finishing the course and continuing on my travels in India and I feel different, I don't know if that sounds cheesy or what but it's true. Vipassana is a meditation technique that brought me directly to my inner physical senses- I went deeper than emotional and psychological level; to a field of mind and matter. And this, as the teacher explains, is where our deep rooted causes of misery and stress lie. It was incredible how memories from a year, two years and many years back surfaced and manifested themselves as physical good and painful sensations in my body. Sometimes I would walk out of the meditation hall dumbfounded by what I just remembered or crying from what I thought I had long ago buried (but never surpassed!). More importantly, I learned how I can heal from so many ills and truly be free and happy by observing that intense physical pain, that daily schedule and that vow of Noble silence to realize the law of nature: impermanence; everything passes from moment to moment, from moment to moment. Nothing, whether good or bad ever remains the same, anicha. I continue to practice this techniqe daily and it has really helped me feel much more at ease. It was so intense and beautiful! On day 10 we break this vow of silence and begin adjusting to talking again. We were all chatter boxes on that day talking about the things we were thinking about each other, the intense moments we experienced and how we felt overall. It was so funny to share these stories because there I was thinking I was the only one thinking certain thoughts when in reality everyone shared the same experiences. It was also funny how I spent 10 days physically very close with several people but only really got to talk with them for a few hours and now I feel like I can share with them just about anything because they went through this same experience, it's amazing.
*with this I realized just how much I write and why it is good to not have access to writing materials as this triggers the mind in so many ways! I realized what the act of writing is for me, what has it been good for, what it has not been good for and even now, I write a lot less. I remember on the 11th day when we were able to get our things back, I opened my journal, read the last entry about my pre-course anxiety ramblings and closed the journal without writing a new entry. I simply did not have words to write what I was feeling or describe what I had just gone through in those 10 days.
Now I am in Darjeeling, the "Queen of Hills" where on a clear day you see the Himalayas (which I have yet to see, but they say it's there!). I am traveling with a few other people that I met on a bus in Patna (another city) all on our way here (with an interesting 11 hour train ride). It's been so great to travel with others and listen to their stories through traveling and life. I was especially impressed with one older woman's story (she about late 50s traveling alone) where she was telling me about how her father passed away when she was 32 and how she changed her life in hopes to become something her father would have been proud of. At the end she said, "Funny thing is that, just about 5 years ago, I realized my father was proud of me just the way I was." Her story struck a personal chord with me and has stayed with me for several days. These are the moments that have truly enriched this experience for me.
